I'm paying for my lack of social interaction today. Carole's hen night is this evening, which was preceded by a lengthy hair and make-up appointment in town. This has resulted in my being left with toddler sitting responsibilities. No bad thing, but lordy have I misjudged the length of the day.
Being the highly unsociable and borderline surly individual you know and (cough) love, I often revel in situations where I'm left in my own company (contemplative thinking, working late in the office, etc) but on this occasion I've made rather a misjudgement.
Although Luca demands constant attention (to say the least) being as young as he presently is does limit conversation somewhat, as does his attention span. For example, earlier today Luca heard a word on the radio that was new to him - mystery. "What does mystery mean Dad?" he enquired. "Well, son" I began, impressed with the boys eagerness to learn along with the opportunity to demonstrate one of my few (very few) strengths "The easiest way for me to explain it to you would involve....."
At this point he pounced onto my knee, grabbed the sides of my head with both hands and proclaimed "Daddy - you've got bogeys in your nose!"
Coming back to the main point, that being one of the difference between loneliness and isolation. With Carole not being present all day, I decided to take Luca out with me to run varying errands (shopping, post office, picking up dog food, etc) rather than do anything of a more social nature (such as football, visiting, etc). It seemed the logical choice at the time, but following Luca's surprisingly early departure to bed at 6.40pm ("I tired Daddy, carry me to bed") I've been left with the realisation that other than the odd "thanks" or "bye" I haven't actually conversed with an adult since yesterday.
Which leads to to my decision to write a blog tonight. As you'll by now have guessed, my reasons for writing aren't as altruistic as usual. Indeed, tonight's blog is merely an opportunity to talk to myself without having to actually speak out loud, therefore reminding myself of the precariousness of sanity.
I'm assuming I'm not alone with these thoughts? Oh God, what if I am? What if no-one else talks out loud to themselves on occasion, and then worries about it? OK, new poll - look to the right of the page and vote post haste!
Before this entry becomes too self indulgent (although I think we "jumped that shark" about two years ago) I'll revert back to it's basic intention - inform you of the vagaries of our family life. Carole first, who interestingly becomes ever more affectionate and gooey eyed as the wedding date approaches. I think part of this is due her relaxing as most arrangements have finally been completed, but extraordinarily I think she's seriously looking forward to being married too. Perhaps I should work a little less and be a little nicer in order to live up to her hopes.
And Luca, what's going on with him? No overt changes I can think of, although his grammar and creative thinking continue to expand. We've been able to reason with him for quite some time now, but lately he's been thinking more, and offers a variety of alternative solutions to problems.
Or "argues more" to put it more simply.
He's also become very affectionate too, and has taken to holding my hand almost permanently when he's around me. Indeed, he even grabbed it yesterday morning at the breakfast table and proceeded to eat his cereal with one hand and hold my hand with the other. Cute. Conversely however, over the last couple of months he's stopped giving me a kiss goodnight. I still get a cuddle "but no kiss". This is part of his growing up I suspect, and one of many that shows his rapid progress from baby to boy. Gratifying to see from so many angles, but sad to lose my baby at the same time.
And me? I'm fine, slight levels of madness aside. Still stupidly working 60-70 hour weeks and eating a diet so bad my doctor would have an aneurysm at the sheer thought, but these aside I'm good.
And I tonight watched what will surely be film of the year in all the end-of-year polls. "Kick Ass". If you haven't seen it rent it now. If you haven't heard of it Google it. And if you keep an open mind you'll love it.
Unless excessive usage of the "C" word is overly off putting.
Tomorrow brings Carole's predicted hangover, so Luca and I will bail out to find refuge and a television to watch Partick Thistle play in Scotland's first cup semi final of the season. Exciting stuff, considering our general ineptitude and malaise, so if you're having a lazy Sunday afternoon then exercise your remote control finger and search your freeview box for the BBC Alba channel at around 3pm
Yes, of course they are going to lose. Now remember to vote and (hopefully) allay my mental health fears.
**Useless fact of the day - BBC Alba's viewing figures per month are around 250000. Total**
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